“We have been using what children care about against them. We’ve been calling it consequences.” When Dr. Gordon Neufeld speaks about attachment, he reminds us that the real purpose of attachment is as a delivery system for care. When a child feels deeply attached, they naturally feel their own caring — no lesson needed. But for generations now, we’ve routinely used what matters most to children against them: taking away what they love, threatening disconnection, calling it “discipline” or “conse
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“We have been using what children care about against them. We’ve been calling it consequences.” When Dr. Gordon Neufeld speaks about attachment, he reminds us that the real purpose of attachment is as a delivery system for care. When a child feels deeply attached, they naturally feel their own caring — no lesson needed. But for generations now, we’ve routinely used what matters most to children against them: taking away what they love, threatening disconnection, calling it “discipline” or “conse
6.6K views11 months ago
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How to Develop Good Attachment with your Child - Attachment Parenting
3:05
How to Develop Good Attachment with your Child - Attachment Parenting
95.3K viewsSep 20, 2013
YouTubeKids In The House
Dr. Neufeld on "Preserving Attachment" (Power to Parent)
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Dr. Neufeld on "Preserving Attachment" (Power to Parent)
24.5K viewsJun 19, 2007
YouTubeNeufeld Institute
Dr. Gordon Neufeld - What Makes a Child Easy to Parent
8:21
Dr. Gordon Neufeld - What Makes a Child Easy to Parent
104.9K viewsJun 14, 2007
YouTubeNeufeld Institute
“For transplanting to be successful, children need to adopt their new ‘parents’.” — Gordon Neufeld When children experience a change in who is raising them—through adoption, fostering, step-parenting, loss, or changes in custody—their attachment roots are inevitably affected. Even when these changes are made with care and good intentions, the developmental impact can be significant. This clip is from Dr. Gordon Neufeld’s course 'Art & Science of Transplanting Children'. In this course, Gordon Ne
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“For transplanting to be successful, children need to adopt their new ‘parents’.” — Gordon Neufeld When children experience a change in who is raising them—through adoption, fostering, step-parenting, loss, or changes in custody—their attachment roots are inevitably affected. Even when these changes are made with care and good intentions, the developmental impact can be significant. This clip is from Dr. Gordon Neufeld’s course 'Art & Science of Transplanting Children'. In this course, Gordon Ne
13.5K views4 months ago
FacebookNeufeld Institute
Join leading expert in attachment, Dr. Gordon Neufeld, at our spring conference as he walks us through The Dance of Attachment which explores the pivotal role attachment plays in our everyday lives, and how we can support our children in building strong, secure relationships. | Institute of Child Psychology
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Join leading expert in attachment, Dr. Gordon Neufeld, at our spring conference as he walks us through The Dance of Attachment which explores the pivotal role attachment plays in our everyday lives, and how we can support our children in building strong, secure relationships. | Institute of Child Psychology
87.8K viewsMar 21, 2022
FacebookInstitute of Child Psychology
Attachment: The preeminent need of all creatures - Dr. Gordon Neufeld
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Attachment: The preeminent need of all creatures - Dr. Gordon Neufeld
5.7K viewsDec 12, 2013
YouTubeIMFcanada
53:35
62: Dr. Gordon Neufeld | Hold On To Your Kids: Unveiling the Power of Parental Attachment
4.4K viewsApr 4, 2024
YouTubeThe Conrad Family
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The most powerful force in parenting is invisible — and yet everything depends on it. In The Vital Connection, Dr. Gordon Neufeld unfolds the central insight that changed his work: parenting doesn’t hinge on techniques or strategies, but on the relationship a child has with the adult responsible for them. This course was created because our culture no longer protects this relational foundation. We have to make the invisible visible — to give words, understanding, and direction to the very contex
5.3K views5 months ago
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Gordon Neufeld - Alchetron, The Free Social Encyclopedia
3 months ago
alchetron.com
0:40
“Parenthood is above all a relationship, not a skill to be acquired.” - Gordon Neufeld in 'Hold On to Your Kids' In this clip, Dr. Gordon Neufeld reminds us that the heart of parenting isn’t found in techniques or perfect moves. It begins in relationship — in showing up as the answer your child is seeking. Link in bio at @neufeldinstitute *** This is a clip from an episode of Robot Unicorn Podcast hosted by Jess VanderWier from @nurturedfirst To hear the full conversation, search for the episode
3.7K views5 months ago
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“Aggression is one of the most misunderstood behaviours.” – Dr. Gordon Neufeld Children don’t strike out because they mean to harm. As Dr. Neufeld explains, aggression often shows up when a child is up against something they cannot change. Hitting, biting, tantrums, and outbursts point to frustration that has not yet found its way to futility. The movement from mad to sad is the key. When tears of futility can come, the attacking energy subsides. Until then, the behaviour tells us the child is f
405.4K views5 months ago
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Our deepest drive isn’t survival — it’s togetherness. In this clip, Dr. Gordon Neufeld explains emotion as Nature’s way of taking care of our most basic need: attachment. When something goes wrong, our first impulse is to seek our people — Where’s mom? Where’s dad? Where’s my family? — even if it means moving toward danger rather than away from it. Emotion, in his words, serves attachment. It rises most strongly when separation is faced and works to close the gap between us. When we see behaviou
8.9K views5 months ago
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2:10
Parent-child bond can go wrong in may ways - Dr. Gordon Neufeld
12.3K viewsDec 12, 2013
YouTubeIMFcanada
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Dr. Gordon Neufeld on our flagship course (starts this Friday!): "The Intensive I is labeled 'making sense of kids' because it's an insight approach; you're looking to how nature works, and how we can serve as midwives to that process. It's completely different than other approaches because they're all outcome-based. You're always trying to shape behaviour. It's a hugely relieving course actually; to know what is our role, what is Nature's role, to have an understanding of what the developmental
828 viewsSep 18, 2024
FacebookNeufeld Institute
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Why Some Kids Seem Bossy | Dr. Gordon Neufeld on Alpha Children More and more children today are presenting as bossy, prescriptive, and demanding — what Dr. Neufeld calls alpha children. Behind this behavior is often an alpha complex — a child attaching by taking the lead, rather than resting in our care. If you’d like to learn more about this dynamic, Gordon Neufeld has unfolded it in a 4-session course, Alpha Children: https://www.neufeldinstitute.org/alpha #alphachildren #parenting #attachmen
43.1K views8 months ago
FacebookNeufeld Institute
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How to Help a Child with Impulsive Behavior - Gordon Neufeld, PhD
51K viewsSep 22, 2014
YouTubeKids In The House
54:11
Ep 11: Separation, Trauma, and Healing in Adoption with Dr. Gordon Neufeld
6.9K viewsMay 31, 2022
YouTubeAdoption Unfiltered
1:44:38
Dr Gordon Neufeld: Your Child NEEDS to Cry | The Science of Attachment, Futility & Emotional Healing
25.9K views6 months ago
YouTubeMindArchitect
51:19
Dr. Gordon Neufeld on Redefining Parental Power & Connection
2.9K viewsOct 11, 2023
YouTubeTeach Your Kids
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FREE event with Dr. Gordon Neufeld & Heather Ferguson — November 24th at 11AM PT - Register at NeufeldInstitute.org/taste How do we give a child a firm, non-negotiable no while also offering the warm, soft landing their emotions require? This is one of the core challenges of parenting with attachment in mind — and one of the themes we’ll explore together. Together With Celena Krahn, Heather Ferguson will be leading Power to Parent I: The Vital Connection starting this January. Dr. Neufeld and He
1.7K views5 months ago
FacebookNeufeld Institute
1:00:50
Dr. Gordon Neufeld - Hold On to Your Kids
7.1K viewsJul 7, 2016
YouTubeGreat Parenting Simplified
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“Children must never work for our love. They must rest in it.” - Gordon Neufeld. Many of us have made the same mistakes. We have said things like: "I can’t be your friend if you’re going to be like that. Off to your room. I withdraw the invitation to exist in my presence…" Everyday interactions like this can place children in charge of preserving the connection. Too often, they find themselves working for the relationship—holding on when that role was never meant to be theirs. The restlessness t
80.3K views5 months ago
FacebookNeufeld Institute
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Children were meant to be raised in a village — a village of attachment. - Dr. Gordon Neufeld.
2.4K views4 months ago
YouTubeNeufeld Institute
35:33
Ep. 5 | True Play with Dr Gordon Neufeld - Part 1
1.1K viewsJan 21, 2020
YouTubeFamily 360 Podcast
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Dr. Gordon Neufeld shares about the crisis of kids not fitting in.
1.9K viewsApr 23, 2025
YouTubeNurtured First
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THE MOST IMPORTANT 7 MINUTES of Hold On To Your Kids by Dr. Gordon Neufeld
7.8K viewsJun 24, 2020
YouTubeTaking Back Eden - FE
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How Gordon Neufeld’s Hold On to Your Kids Can Inspire and Shape Our Homeschools
499 viewsJan 24, 2025
YouTubeTeresa Wiedrick, Homeschool Life Coach
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The Truth About Yelling At Kids - Gordon Neufeld, PhD
85.3K viewsMar 6, 2014
YouTubeKids In The House
1:03:26
Hold On To Your Kids | Dr. Gordon Neufeld | ABTY Podcast Episode 197
6.4K viewsNov 1, 2022
YouTubeALWAYS BETTER THAN YESTERDAY (ABTY)
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